As I was writing this post, I was
thinking of maybe turning this blog to a condolences page, since most of what I
write about here are martyrs and lost lives.
Maybe I will.
On the night of March 10th
two Palestinians were shot dead, the following morning four Palestinians got
killed, one shot dead by Israeli Occupation Forces, and the rest during an
Israeli raid over the Gaza strip. This
sounds dry, doesn't it? Six Palestinians killed in less than 24 hours, so what?
The world seems to be doing just fine. I seem to be doing just fine, and I’m
positive whoever is reading this is doing just fine as well. If that’s the
case, then it’s time for this so-called judgment day we’ve been told about over
and over again all of our lives to come, where maybe some justice will prevail, if ever. This is not a world to be lived in,
when lives are lost this easily and moved on over so easily.
One of the young Palestinians who got killed was Saji, a 19 year old student at my university, Birzeit University. And they've (The Students Council and the University's Administration) prepared a tribute for him, to honor him and say our final goodbye.
All of my life, I’ve been trying
to avoid funerals. I’m a coward when it
comes to death, it’s not something I can deal with, accept, or understand. Nonetheless, when I heard of Saji’s
death, a student at my university, I wore a black blouse, got my Kuffiyeh, and
went down to university for his tribute.
Thousands and thousands of
students, employees, and professors were there; standing in the middle of the university’s
campus, waiting, in complete silence and sorrow. We were waiting for him. For
Saji.
I don’t know if “nervous” is the
word to use for the waiting part, but all of us were not at ease waiting. We were informed that he’s to arrive soon,
everything went silent. Not a breath could be heard, no inhale, no exhale, no
chatter, no leaves rustle, nothing but complete utter silence. It was the first time ever I could hear my
heart beat this loudly, but then again I wasn’t the only one. All of us,
standing there waiting, could hear our hearts beat, the same beat for the first
time.
Then suddenly from afar we could hear
people chant, I couldn’t make sense of what they were saying, but it only meant
one thing, Saji was here and he was close by. Silence, other than our heart
beats, dominated the scene.
The chants got closer and closer,
and our unified heart beats got louder and louder.
Then there he was. Carried by his
friends, colleagues, professors, and students from the university, and they
were screaming their hearts out for him.
“Allahu Akbar Allahu Akbar
Saji, the spark that ignited the revolution’s
flame
Saji the martyr, shall never go in vain”
At that point we’ve all lost it,
those who could find their voices would scream for him with the others, and
those who couldn’t would weep in silence. All of us were either crying or
yelling or gasping for air or trembling, but him. He was so calm, serene, and
solid.
He was so at peace, and that made
it even harder for us who were losing it.
He looked so beautiful. Not in a senseless
way, no. He was beautiful in every way, in a way that makes you want to become
him. So beautiful, so peaceful, and calm, the opposite of all of us, we were
these ugly creatures at distress and without any clue as to what the hell we
were doing.
"During Saji's tribute at Birzeit University's campus"
Later we found out that Saji was one
of these many Palestinians that refused to remain silent, in any way they could
manage. If he could throw rocks at settlers who attack his village, he would.
If he could go on a demonstration against these pointless negotiations, he
would. If there’s a demonstration against the illegal inhumane Apartheid Wall,
he’d go no questions asked. When a Palestinian is killed, he’d go for his funeral
and scream out his name as loudly as he could, the same that has happened for him during
his funeral.
He was not silent. He was not
passive. He was a fighter in the best way he could. And if we truly wanted to
honor him, the least we could do is portray him as such.
That’s why this photo that has
been displayed all over the internet, is choking me.
Till this moment it hasn’t been
confirmed if Saji was really throwing rocks at settlements and the soldiers
protecting them or not (since you know, most people assume that Israeli
Occupation Forces need a reason to shoot and kill Palestinians). But
nonetheless, it’s disgusting to use him in such manner, only to impress this “international
community” – which this photo is made for- to get their sympathies.
Disgusting doesn't even come close to describing it.
Why is it so important for us to impress
or gain people’s support, not all of them of course, who genuinely don’t give a
shit about us? You really want to impress your glorified international society?
Tell the truth.
There’s no shame in fighting the occupation
back. What’s shameful is not fighting back and fabricating stories only to fit
the victim role that will never ever help or change the reality we’re living in.
Yes, we are victims of the Israeli Occupation, but that does not mean we should
be helpless, passive, and hopeless victims. We should be like Saji, do whatever we can to
refuse it. If it was throwing rocks at the illegal Israeli Settlements, at
Israeli Soldiers, then so be it. If it was jumping over the Apartheid Wall and
risk being shot instead of being humiliated over a checkpoint, then so be it. If
it was refusing to bring down the Palestinian flag from our houses because the Israeli
Authorities, for some reason, are terrified of it, then so be it.
But saying that one of our young
occupation-fighters simply got killed feeding his goats to get the approval of
people and parties, who could care less, is beyond sickening and so freaking
pathetic.
Saji is not the victim here,
people who agree with this photo, who share it, who support it; are. Photos
like these agree with the assumption that in order to be right and have people's support; we can only be victims.
What are the reasons behind this? I don’t know. Maybe we want to be more “peaceful”
than "violent", maybe we’re tired of being called terrorists, I don’t know. But none
of these ridiculous motives matter, this should stop.
What photos like these only do is
make it seem as if it was wrong to resist the Israeli Occupation. As my
professor has put it perfectly, “Occupation itself is the crime, not resisting
it”.
So Saji and every single
Palestinian who refuses the reality of the occupation and fight back on daily bases
are not the victims; those who are ashamed of fighting back are. Being a victim
is not a choice, but being a passive victim is, so it’s time to decide on which side we want to stand.
May all of your blessed souls
rest in and find peace.
"Saji's brother Sa'd during his funeral, and he's put around his neck his Kuffieye filled with his brother's blood of when he got shot"